Little Sisters

When I was 13, my mom told me she was pregnant with a girl.
Up until that point, I'd only lived with brothers. Stephen? Check. Kameron? Check. Keanu? Check. All brothers, all there.
I was fully expecting another brother.

I was so surprised to hear I was going to have a sister that I told my mom to go back to the hospital and have them turn her into a boy, or else.

She told me I wouldn't always feel that way, that I'd see that baby girl and love her. I didn't believe her but, MAN, was she right.

Last night, I was getting a little annoyed with my 10 year old sister. She was talking a lot, and being similar to velcro. I've been sharing a room with her for three weeks, and had been thinking about how nice it would be to be back in my own room, in my quiet space. No clothes scattered across the floor. No stuffed animal mountains in the corner. No weird plates or rocks or things jumping out to attack me.

But, then it hit me, that would mean no more baby sister. As I was lying in bed (HER bed) I started to get a little choked up. There I was, thinking about all these things that were kind of annoying. Things that mean that my little sister is still a little girl. She's still young enough that she thinks I'm the coolest person on earth. She still wants to cuddle on the couch, and draw me silly pictures. She still tells me everything, including really strange jokes. She still likes me enough that she ditches her friends for me. She shares her favorite stuffed animals with me, and plays arcade games with me.

I kind of decided that there is no way I can be annoyed with her little antics. Her picky eating. Her sometimes awkward comments. Not when they're so short lived. She's already grown a full 10 years, and those went by in the blink of my left eye.

Who's to say the next 10 won't happen in the blink of my other eye?

My baby sister is my best friend. My mini me. My little shadow. I'm so glad she wasn't born a boy - and I secretly hope she never grows out of thinking I'm awesome. Maybe when we're 20 and 33, we can still cuddle on the couch and watch animal planet.

All You Need is Love, Unless (of course) Love Isn't Enough.

In this Christmas season, we remember a lot of things....
the things we want to get as gifts, the things we want to give.
We remember that it is time for roasts and hams and chickens and turkeys.
It is time for mashed potatoes, cookies, hot chocolate.

We remember to send Christmas cards, and to visit with old friends.
We remember to shovel our driveways, and salt the sidewalks.
We remember to go to church, and praise the birth of the little Lord Jesus.

But do we really remember what is most important?
Do we remember that, above all things, this is the season to love each other?
Do we remember those without homes? Without families?
Do we stop to give to those in need?
Do we remember to do acts of kindness? Service?

In this season of remembering, I'd like to remember publicly that I am lucky to be in a position where I can give to those who need it (maybe not much, and maybe not often), that I am grateful that I am not one of those in need of service or acts of kindess this season, and that I have a family that I love very much.

I hope that, in the future, I am able remember these things more often than the holiday season. =)

December

Dear Blog,

I haven't forgotten about you. I've just been very busy. Between reading 26 novels and something like 6 textbooks this semester, plus teaching and writing projects and presentations, I've been really bad at keeping you updated. But, don't be mad. I'm back for the winter, and I hope to provide you with some interesting things.

Maybe poetry. Maybe a short story. Maybe a long rant about something pointless.

Either way, don't be afraid. I haven't gone anywhere.

Love
Nikki

This Little Light of Mine.

Death is life's greatest tragedy.

Tonight, I light a candle for a friend who chose to extinguish his own light early.

A Wrinkle in Time: A Complaint.

I read the book last night for a class.
This afternoon, on Netflix, I noticed the movie was queued up. I decided I'd watch it.
WOW! What problems I have with this movie.

It is not like me to compare books and movies (so I will try to refrain from doing so here). The movie is, at best, okay. Even if the book had never existed, I would maybe give the movie three stars out of five.

For those of you who are interested in how the movie and book compare: they don't. They are very very different. But who cares, really. They are two different mediums - they should be different from one another. Let's be honest. 6% of the viewing audience has read the book - the film makers are not catering to the readers.

But that is not where my problem lays.

My problem is that they casted this wonderful woman as Mrs. Whatsit:

But when she transforms into "her true self" she looked like this:


Why cast a strong, African American lead only to turn her into the white-savior? Why couldn't she keep her own head? Why does she have to be a blonde white woman (or something between a man and woman)? All the heroes they talk about in the book are all white men, too.

I am having a problem with the white-savior thing. I'm offended that they'd make Mrs. Whatsit's "true" form that of a white human. They should have casted a white woman, then. Why, in all of the things they decide to change in the process of turning this into a film, did they not change THIS? One of the things that would make SENSE to change?

Maybe I've been reading too much critical theory, but this really irks me. What does this say to African American audiences? Furthermore, what does this say to white audiences? That at the heart of every black person is the essence of whiteness?

I guess the other thing that bothers me is that Mrs. Whatsit is just in a temporary form. She can transition from form to form. So, the idea that this form is just temporary, and that she can be something better in the future...that also bothers me. And the idea that they are fighting the "darkness" enveloping their planet....what does THAT mean?

Do with this what you will. But I felt it necessary to talk about.

I'm Gonna Run Right Up This Hill - Summer Sky or Winter Chill.

Today was my first day at Crosswinds as an actual teacher. Granted, I'm only there teaching a one-week unit as part of an assignment, and it's all very safe and contained....I am still very excited about the whole ordeal.

So, we're teaching our units in groups (I'm paired...or trio'd as it were) with Ali and Teran. Our unit is a print journalism unit, and by the end of the week the kids will have written little articles that we will then put into a class newspaper! We're very excited about it - at least, I know I am very excited about it - which is why I think it hit me so hard when one of the kids told their friend during the passing period that they found the class boring. Seriously. I guess when you put your heart and soul into something, you just want them to love it as much as you do.

I will say that I really enjoyed trying out some "classroom ecology" techniques. My class is a mix of 6, 7 and 8th graders...so getting them (and keeping them) all on task has been pretty difficult....especially because we aren't their regular teachers, they aren't getting graded and... oh...they're all the struggling readers or the students that are falling behind. FURTHERMORE - the broadcasting journalism teacher told one of them that print journalism is boring and useless.

Thanks.

I wish that the students were being held accountable for their work in the class. They really have no incentive to participate.

It was awesome to see the different group dynamics between periods 1 and 2. Group 1 was quieter and a little more difficult to motivate. Group 2 was energetic and full of opinions (and slightly hard to keep on task). Even though it has been one day, it's been interesting to think about how we will have to adjust for the different classes. Tomorrow, I am being recorded for an assignment and I'm pretty nervous about it. But I am also excited to be able to review myself and see what I could be doing better (and also give myself some praise for the things I'm good at).

I wish we had done a better job with making the assignments relavent (just for today). We did some really meaningful activities, but we didn't really bring them full circle. I also think we could have focused the classes attention's a little more. I think we got swept up in the chaos of the first day - by the time I'd realized what we'd done, I couldn't jump in and save us. Our window had passed.

But, there is always tomorrow - and I think it will be a good, productive (and more guided) day.

And this is my theme song:

We're Wonder Pets, and We'll Help You.

I have an immature obsession with The Wonder Pets.
No. I do not have kids. Yes, I am working on my masters degree. No, it is not in early childhood education.

I just really really love The Wonder Pets!
I mean, a guinea pig, a duckling and a turtle get in a flying-boat to save other animals who needs their help!?

It's so innocent.

Their biggest emphasis is actually team work. There isn't a secret message hidden in the show. No secret political jokes, no age inappropriate content, no over stimulating special effects....and: no one is trying to indoctrinate your kids! It's so straight forward (ok, sure maybe there is a note or two every once in a while about recycling so that the baby dolphin doesn't need to be rescued again).

Anyway, I love this silly show, and watch it from time to time, despite the fact that I am a grown adult. The characters are hilarious, the story line is basic but manages to keep me laughing the entire time.